How To Actually “Find Yourself”

It might be what all of us millennials are saying nowadays but the idea of “finding ourselves” is not new.

The difference is that now, more than ever, we have the opportunity to create the space to allow ourselves to do just that.

This so-called “space” I’m talking about is what lights you up and brings you joy.. . it’s the cross between what you want to do for the rest of your life and what people will actually pay you to do.

BUT are we just using the whole “finding ourselves” as an excuse to drop everything, start a business/freelance gig and travel the world?

Not an excuse but a driving force I’d say.

Trying to find myself is something my first business allowed me to do.

The amount of thing’s I’ve learned about business and myself since I started my business doesn’t compare to anything else I’ve ever experienced.

People often say that this or that person has not yet found himself. But the self is not something one finds, it is something one creates. — Thomas Szasz

So how do you actually find yourself ?

First of all, you don’t actually find yourself. There is not going to be this one magical day where you find yourself because finding yourself would mean you were lost in the first place.

You’re not lost.

You are simply searching for something that brings meaning into your life so the only way to find that is by trying different things.

Finding yourself is not something that happens once or that happens at one point it time… it’s something that has to be worked on every single day.

How boring would life be if finding yourself was something you could check off your to-do list. What would happen next? Are you not planning to continue to grow and evolve?

My guess/hope is that you are…

Back in August, I hired a storytelling coach and one of the thing’s she asked me during our session was

Why do you need to find yourself?

I answered and she simply replied with

And then what?

I continued to answer and she just kept replying with

And then what?

And then what?

So, my question to you is why are you trying to “find yourself” and what will happen when you do?

Finding yourself comes down to feeling fulfilled because you had the courage to create the person you knew you could be.

Here is what you can do to begin creating the space that will allow you to find yourself:

  • Start a side-hustle in something you are passionate about

^This will allow you to try new things while you still have the safety of your 9–5

  • Don’t know what you are passionate about? Then what sounds interesting to you? Writing? Drawing? Dancing? Baking? Just try it all and see what you actually like. It’s ok to develop passions vs. assume you are born with them

  • Listen to self-development podcasts during your 9–5 commute so that you get a better idea of why you are even trying to find yourself in the first place

  • Start freelancing so that you get your feet wet and see what you enjoy doing the most

  • Take a solo trip somewhere. It doesn’t have to be to Europe or Thailand but it could be to a nice town 1–3 hours from you.

Creating yourself in a world that is trying to tell you who to be won’t be easy but I promise you the journey is worth it.